So, you wanna rock that 80's aesthetic? You wanna be that cool kid who gets detention, but still gets A's? Then you've come to the right place.

I know you. I see into your soul.

You dream of being Ferris Bueller or Jennifer Connelly, you live for the moment, you have an 80s soundtrack blasting so hard in the back of your skull you may aswell be dancing in a black and white painting.

If this sounds like you, then you need to get with the times chief.

You needa pick up one of these bad boy kicks:

A Nike, Blazer.

The answers to all you seek, to all the questions, all the answers, all you've ever dreamt! Are found within these shoes. You put these bad boys on, lace 'em up tight, step out the door and...

*BAM*

You're Marty Mcfly flying through the sky in a 1983 DMC DeLorean at 88 Miles Per Hour, time hopping from century to century, kickin' ass, chewing bubblegum and takin' names.

You, are, that, person.

Cool of the cool. The creme de la creme.

The universe itselfs stops spinning its wheels just to admire YOU, the new brightest star burning in its sky rockin' them Nike Blazers.

BUT!... Be forewarned.

The amount of coolness you will embody wearing a pair of these shoes may overcome you, may envelope your entire being. The old proverb stands "If you cant stand the heat then get out of the kitchen".

Perhaps settle for Adidas, no one will blame you.

On the other hand though!

If you've fire in your heart! And a glimmer in your eyes from staring directly into the sun as you rock 10 million pairs of aviators while guitars shoot flames and scream in the background as you wait for your turn to fight in VALHALLA!

Then maybe, just maybe, these are the shoes for you.

Godspeed Retrowavers.